Did you know You Cannot NOT Communicate? Everything you do is a communication whether spoken, written, gesture, the eyes or body language. With all these forms of communications we still have problems communicating. With all the rules changes umpires and sports officials have problems as well. And they have replay to right any wrongs yet are still vulnerable to mistakes. What did you see? Not what you saw. Now what did he say? I don’t know. Do you understand? Nope, do you? Two hours in a meeting and I still don’t know what’s happening let alone what was said (ahh Eminems Gibberish).

Next time you are listening to a speaker drone on you’re waiting for the speaker to utter those oh so welcome words: In closing. Finally. Last for now (oh no, is there a next time)? We remember the last of the speakers words because we have been promoted to prepare to leave. Bathroom. Snack, Chit-Chat. Lunch. Fresh Air. Loosen the tie.We walk the communications line between understanding and being understood. I am so understanding I cannot understand anyone not understanding me (Lenny Bruce I think).

We have text, instant, e-mail, phone, bird chirps and posts (like this) yet we continue to encounter miscommunications. We speak, write and emote in letters and symbols. Words, let alone sentences and paragraphs are obsolete. We don’t have patience for them. Quick. Fast. Inefficient. Done. Click Send. Like our food. Quick. Fast. Unhealthy.

Example: Messages of more than a few sentences are rarely completely read. Thus the opening for miscommunications. With all the debt saddled communications majors from college one might think we would have better communications. It’s like the computer, which when they first came on the market and popular (not necessary, like today) the world was going to save the trees since everything would be “stored and secure” (hacking was not around yet I think) and the need for paper would be greatly reduced. We use more paper now than back then. Copy. Copy. Copy. Everyone needs and wants a copy. The start of clutter!!! I didn’t know. You didn’t tell me. The first thing head jockeys tell you is you must communicate with each other. A revelation.

Did you get my message? If not, here it is again. I love you. Really I do. Is the “really I do” necessary. Really I do is a Meta Message (How about that one). Yeah, a message about a message. Why? Are we insecure? Fear of rejection? Fear of success? Do we not believe the original message was received? Do we need to make our message more believable and forceful? When you tell someone you love them that is all you need to do. I Love You says it all. Most of us wait what seems to be a lifetime to hear those words. When it comes from your heart it is sincere, honest and true. Imagine there are those who have never been told those three little words. Sad.

Communications: Mixed Messages. Lets’ go back to I love You. It becomes a mixed message when you are told I Love You followed by some form of inappropriate action such as a physical encounter. I thought you loved me. why did you hurt me?

Mixed Message; Telling kids not to smoke as you are hacking up a lung, with a cigarette pack visible in your shirt pocket, yellow / brown stained teeth and smelling like a full ashtray. You are not believable and a poor role model. Don’t say. DO!!! Lead by example. That’s what Leadership is all about not from a book, seminar, symposium forum, e-learning, lecture and workshop. Leadership is leading not talking about it. Communications is at the forefront of Leadership. Open doors. Accessible. Aware.

Communications Message: Trust: You tell your “friend”. I’ll pick you up from work at  10 PM. It’s 11:15 PM and they are still waiting for you. Here comes the excuses which from earlier posts you know are explanations for failures. Trust is broken. Next time I’ll get a lift from oobur.

Everything is fine, until it isn’t.

I thought I was wrong once but I was mistaken.

Keep It Simple – Keep -It Real.



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